Mammoth Milestone Moment: 80kilos!

You heard right - I've finally hit my 80 KILOS LOST MARK!  

YAY for 80!

81 to be exact, after this morning's shock 2.1 loss!!!  I'm pretty excited by this milestone - I didn't actually think I'd get this far (I mean, I've been saying that every five kilos since my 30kgs lost... !!) - but 80 just seemed WAY out of reach!   It's just one of those numbers that - in my head - just seemed completely unobtainable, and I've been struggling the past month to actually meet it (ALOT of yo-yoing in the meantime - and most of the struggles have been all in my head!).

VERY excited to meet it this week, and in light of having overcome that little mental hurdle and finally shaking hands with this milestone, I've come up with 80 of MY MOST POSITIVE CHANGES to date!   It seemed fitting, given how much HAS changed over the course of the last three years...

SO here we go....  80 of my most treasured and FUN changes SO FAR... (in no particular order)....

1. I can now bend down...  no, seriously, I can BEND and touch my toes - no issues!
2. I can wear non-stretch cotton  - a HUGE no-no before, could never move or breathe if I sat down!
3. I can actually fit in a Cinema chair now - and not feel like I'm overhanging onto the other side
4. I wake up and just kind of jump out of bed?!   Seriously!  (except for post-training days where the muscles are really really sore...!) 
5. ... and, for that matter, I can actually TRAIN my muscles to that point of being really really sore, and still keep going... HA! 
6. My car driver's seat is no longer pushed all the way back, to accommodate my girth 
7. ... and I no longer fear using someone else's car because I won't fit in THEIR driver's seat!!
8. The tape measure I measure myself with actually fits ALL THE WAY AROUND now (with plenty of leftovers - I had to use two sticky taped together before) 
9. I can actually BUY clothes off the rack now...  at one point I couldn't even buy my sizing - would have to source them from overseas and fluke it if it fit... 
10. ... and I can actually SHOP in normal retail outlets and find something to wear - and NOT have it cost a small fortune!!!
11. I don't have to turn sideways to get into my shower anymore, or to get through small doors
12. ... and I can actually bend down and shave my legs without the rush of blood to my head making me want to pass out!
13. I actually have shirts that have an "XS" size label on them now, not the 7XL men's I used to have to buy!!!!  (OMG was that a revelation!!!)
14. My feet have shrunk.... honestly?!  I've gone down half a size in my runners... 
15. I now take the stairs... they're no longer my most feared method of entry into an establishment!
16. I now walk in public!
17. .... longer than just to the end of the block - now do over 9kms a hit!
18. .... in a singlet top!!!!!  (bare arms were a huge no-no for me 'before')
19. .... in bright colours!!!!!     Black used to be the only colour I'd wear (and I'm not a Goth!)... not any more!
20. ..... AND I RUN!!!    My walking circuit now includes running intervals - in public!!! 
21. I no longer choose the 'large' / upsized option of ANYTHING - small or regular is quite ok with me!
22. .... and forget "two for one" or "multi-pack" deals too...  A useless marketing ploy that might help the wallet, but never actually helps the hips!
23. I no longer fear sweating!   I've embraced the fact that in order to train effectively, I MUST sweat, huff and puff and probably look pretty un-co doing it.  STIFF if someone else doesn't like it - I will NOT be ashamed by that any more! 
24. My favourite snack now is blueberries!!!   (not chocolate, chips, popcorn, lollies, cake, crackers & cheese...)
25. I can walk down the street now with my HEAD UP and smile at passers by - not eyes to the ground and hoping no-one will notice me... 
26. Scales are no longer my mortal enemy - they're just a tool and something I use to stay on track!
27. My number one training tool is my heart rate monitor - it goes EVERYWHERE with me when I know I'm going to burn some cals - numbers make me work harder! 
28. I'm learning to accept and appreciate compliments - they're no longer something I fear or avoid - and I now say 'thank you'!
29. I've now worn out FOUR pairs of Adidas runners, hahaha!  My 5th generation pair don't know what they're in for...!!
30. I've discovered I DO indeed have muscles and bones in both my arms and legs...  I thought they were just filled with fat cells before, seriously couldn't see anything else aside from blubber?! 
31. I am no longer completely and unequivocally offended by the word 'FAT' - it no longer has the same bearing on me that it used to... 
32. When someone talks to me, I don't break out in a sudden 'anxiety sweat' the way I used to
33. I've discovered that I don't actually make people vomit if they hug me (despite my irrational thinking that I did 'before' - truly believed I was so repulsive that I made people physically ill if they touched me)
34. I actually like cooking!!!  (another revelation!)  Trying new healthy recipes and taking full control of what goes into my mouth via the kitchen and stove, is VERY empowering!
35. I'm now brave enough to go to the GYM!  (recent success - but VERY proud of myself for that)
36. I have been "fast food free" for 165 weeks now - and won't be breaking that any time soon
37. ... and I CAN go into a fast food restaurant and order a water and nothing else!!!  (you should see the look on their faces when I do that... priceless!) 
38. I am no longer a slave to my cravings
39. .... nor a slave to my emotional eating issues neither, for the most part!
40. I LOVE dancing in public now
41. ..... and am totally addicted to my Zumba classes as a result (my first ever group training session has become one of my most favoured healthy addictions!)
42. I no longer think I'm going to break the elevator when I get in
43. I no longer think I'm going to break the chair I'm sitting on
44. I CAN have a conversation about training and food and NOT want to hide from sheer embarrassment for sounding like a hypocrite because of my size
45. I am no longer invisible to men...  ?!!!!  o.O   (yeah, I'm not quite sure what to do with that one yet... hahaha) 
46. I can wear SHORTS!!!!    Albeit, just around the house and during training - but YAY!
47. I actually have collarbones AND a neck!  They're no longer hidden by copious amounts of fat
48. I sleep better because I can breathe easier laying down
49. I am now addicted to WATER as my number one hydration source!   Peppermint tea makes a very close second, but nothing else cuts it! 
50. I now WANT to socialise with my friends - no longer want to stay hidden away incase I'm just an embarrassment to be seen with... 
51. I actually don't mind having my photo taken now - full body shots included!  (it's a miracle!!!) 
52. I'm actually LIKING the new curves that my body is starting to take shape into (SHOCK!) 
53. I can now eat in public without feeling like a freak with everyone pre-judging me on what I put into my mouth
54. I CAN say NO to all the treats and temptations that are waved under my nose (for the most part!)
55. Chips as a side dish are NOT always necessary!!!! 
56. Grilled fish beats deep-fried anything EVERY time!
57. I can actually get up off the ground without feeling like I'm about to keel over again 
58. I can actually KNEEL ON MY KNEES again!!  YAYYYYY!!!   That was a discovery I made in the last couple of weeks - after years of not being able to kneel AT ALL (with horrible pain on top), I could actually DO the lunges, squats AND kneeling poses of my session!!!   (liberating as hell) 
59. I have an amazing 'support network' of people who understand my fears, tantrums, demons and issues with this weightloss mission - and no longer feel so "alone" or isolated - and I absolutely treasure them for it!
60. I no longer see food as an "enemy" - just a fuel source that can work wonders when used properly
61. I am willing to try new things - foods and activities - that will propel me even further forward
62. .... and in doing that, have already broken down alot of barriers and overcome personal challenges in the process! 
63. I believe in rewarding yourself for a "job well done" - and acknowledging the effort you've put in to achieve them
64. Buying healthy food IS worth the price tag!!! 
65. Sleep is a vital part of good health and not to be skimped on
66. I now get really excited at the prospect of a big scary challenge...  hahaha!  I know, I'm a sicko...
67. Yummy foods are nice in moderation - but NOTHING tastes as good as the amazing feeling of power, control and health running through your veins!  (... and it's SUPER sexy!!!) 
68. I have physically added years to my life - I've dropped my body's biological age significantly
69. I am passionate about changing my health and helping others find their own courage to instigate amazing changes too - it drives me every day and helps me stay true to my own mission
70. I've been told I'm AN ATHLETE! Hahahha....  yup, that's still one of the funniest compliments I've had yet... still makes me burst out laughing!!! 
71. ... and apparently I'm pretty easy on the eyes too?!   (hahahahaha.... again!) 
72. I've dropped over 43% of my original body weight
73. .... and 80 kilos is completely INSANE in my head - how I ever managed to carry that amount of weight, I'll never know...   I can barely lift my 18kgs kayak!!!.... 
74. I smile - ALL THE TIME!
75. ... and I have MANY MORE happy and positive days than I do down and dreary days now - the tide has definitely turned... 
76. I now want to LIVE and see what this life of mine has to offer, I want and deserve a future!
77. I now know I have WORTH and have a huge sense of PRIDE in myself and in what I've achieved (and will continue to achieve)
78. I really like the person I'm turning into - she's fun, motivated, happy and driven - she's ME!
79. According to my tarot reading, I am a MAGICIAN - I CAN DO ANYTHING!!    
80. ... and will ABSOLUTELY see this final 20kilo goal through!  Bring on my 90 mark!!!

... and I'm sure there's HEAPS more floating around here too - but 80 will suffice for now, haha!

80 tastes freaking delicious!!!

Again, a big thank you to all the gorgeous people who help keep me on track - I value your input and support SO much, and I'm SO grateful and humbled by all the people I have cheering me on!  You guys ROCK!

Now focused strictly on getting into double digits...  you'll all know why soon enough... !!!!   ;)

ALWAYS FORWARD!!

xx   :)